The Weirdo’s Guide to Success: Create Your Own Definition

Success comes with a surprisingly specific default picture.

Good career. More money. Bigger house. Impressive title. Nice car. More followers. Maybe a kitchen island large enough to require its own ZIP code.

None of those things are bad.

The problem starts when you inherit that definition without ever asking whether you actually want it.

Success means very little until you decide what it means to you.

The Default Definition Is Not Your Only Option

Most of us grow up absorbing ideas about what a successful life should look like. Depending on your circumstances, that could sound like:

• Get the degree.
• Build the career.
• Earn more.
• Buy the house.
• Keep moving upward.
• Those milestones can be meaningful, but they are not automatically meaningful to everyone.

One person may genuinely love climbing the corporate ladder.

Another may want enough income to work fewer hours and surf three mornings a week.

Someone else may care more about creating art, raising a family, traveling, building a business, competing in a sport, or having the freedom to decide what Tuesday afternoon looks like.

Different lives can be successful for completely different reasons.

Start With The Life, Not The Trophy

It is easy to choose a goal because the outcome looks impressive.

The better question is what the daily life behind that goal actually requires.

Do you want the business, or do you want the freedom you imagine the business will create?
Do you want the promotion, or do you want more financial security?
Do you want a huge audience, or do you want enough people paying attention to make your creative work sustainable?

Sometimes the thing we think we want is really a shortcut to something deeper.

Knowing the difference can save you years of chasing a trophy you never particularly wanted.

Money Matters, But It Is Not The Whole Scoreboard

Pretending money does not matter is not especially helpful.

Financial security can create choices, reduce stress, support the people you care about, and give you access to experiences that would otherwise be difficult.

But more money alone does not tell you whether your life is working.

If earning more requires giving up nearly everything you were hoping the money would allow you to enjoy, the equation may need another look.

Success can include money while also including time, health, relationships, creativity, freedom, purpose, and the ability to enjoy your actual Tuesday instead of permanently living for the weekend.

Decide What You Want More Of

Defining success becomes easier when you stop trying to write the perfect life plan and simply ask what you want more of.

• More time?
• More creativity?
• More challenge?
• More freedom?
• More stability?
• More adventure?
• More connection?
• More mornings where you are excited about what you are about to do?
• Then ask what you want less of.

That part is usually revealing too.

Once you have both lists, compare them with the life you are actually living.

Look at your calendar, your routines, your work, and where most of your energy goes.
How much of what you say you want is already present?
What could you make more room for?
What is taking up time or energy without giving you much back?

You do not have to redesign your entire life in one weekend. Start with one change that moves your real life a little closer to the one you described.

A good definition of success should help you make decisions, not just sound good in a journal.

Your Definition Can Change

The version of success you wanted ten years ago may no longer fit.

That is allowed.

Priorities change as you gain experience, meet people, build relationships, discover new interests, lose old ones, and learn what certain goals actually require.

Changing your definition does not mean you failed at the previous one.

It means you learned something, outgrew a former version of yourself.

Be Careful What You Borrow

Other people's success can be inspiring.

It can also quietly become a very expensive shopping list–financially and emotionally.

You see the house, business, following, lifestyle, body, career, or travel schedule and suddenly decide you should want it too.

Before adding somebody else's goal to your own life, ask one simple question:

Would I still want this if nobody else could see it?

That removes a surprising amount of nonsense.

Make Your Own Scoreboard

Once you know what matters, decide how you will recognize progress.

Success may mean increasing your income.

It may mean working fewer hours.

It may mean finally starting the thing you have talked about for five years.

It may mean getting better at skating, spending more time in the ocean, creating consistently, traveling more, or being present with the people you love.

Your scoreboard does not need to impress anyone else.

It needs to tell you whether your life is moving in a direction you actually want.

Build A Life You Would Choose Again

The point of defining success for yourself is not to lower your standards.

It is to make sure you are working toward the right standards.

Ambition is useful when it is attached to something you genuinely want.

• So, work hard.
• Build things.
• Learn.
• Earn.
• Create.
•  Take risks.

But every once in a while, look up and make sure the life you are building still belongs to you.

Because reaching someone else's finish line is a strange way to discover you were running the wrong race.

Find Your Version Of Success

Your passions are often a good place to start.

They reveal what gives you energy, what you willingly spend time learning, and what makes life feel more like your own.

Explore the Weirdo 4 Life collections and find the passion that deserves a place in your definition of success.

Be Weird. Be You.

By Babsi Wilson | Weirdo 4 Life

Image Source: the blowup